The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
