we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
