office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
