Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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