do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
