It's Friday. Sex?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
