I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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