I'm going to rape someone's good day.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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