yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
