Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
