yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
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