she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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