I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
She bit a glass in half.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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