I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
