I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize