so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
