I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
