that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize