margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
