Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
