can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize