it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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