i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
