It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
