I'm eating all of the evidence.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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