I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
