Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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