SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
