I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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