I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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