Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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