It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
