got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize