called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I intend to get homeless drunk
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
