I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
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