problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize