doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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