I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
