If i come over, it means nothing
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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