Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I cut my penus on the lid.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
