Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
