You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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