At least make sure they are 18
Why
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
40s are totally the cure
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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