Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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