We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
