the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize