Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
