I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize