apparently the secret to your success is patron
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
