No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Randomize
