I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Randomize
